Sunday, December 30, 2007

1 month

Well I made it to one month. At the beginning of all this, I really didn't think I would make it to the next day, let alone the next week or the first month. I have good days and bad days, unfortunately more bad than good still. I miss the companionship and friendship. I miss being in a relationship, having a date for special functions and the closeness. I don't miss the battles of the core personality differences or the rigidity. I don't miss the frustrations, resentments and uncertainties. After reading the book "He's just not that into you" based on an episode of Sex and the City I paraphrased a few affirmations that are helping me see things more clearly.

The person you want to get back together with is the SAME person who looked you in your beautiful face, took full stock of you and all your wonderful qualities, and told you he was no longer in need of your company.

Don't be flattered that he misses you. He SHOULD miss you. You're deeply missable. However, he's still the same person who just broke up with you. The ONLY reason he can miss you is because he's CHOOSING, everyday, NOT to be with you.

It's very tempting when you really want to be with someone to SETTLE for much, much less - even a vague, pathetic facsimile of less - than you would have ever imagined. Keep your eye on the prize!

Of course, I don't believe these affirmations yet, but am hopeful that someday I will.

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